I finally got my iPhone’s playlists ready – I don’t know how it took me this long, but I just synched my favorite mellow music to my device. Lots of enya, classical stuff, and other soothing songs (ie Buddha Lounge Ensemble). I have different tunes too, but I feel most serene when I’m listening to tranquil types of music. Hopefully that’ll help during contractions.
And since I’m on the subject of my iPhone, check out all the baby related apps that now dominate the screen. Geez! I used to barely have two pages of stuff, and now I have an app for timing contractions (Full Term), an app for tracking nursing/sleeping/pooping (Nursing Timer), and both What to Expect apps (the addition of baby is new, I had the pregnancy one previously). Hooray for technology 🙂
I’ve given up on trying to make myself go into labor. I sorta came to the realization last weekend that he’s going to come when he’s ready and me willing it to happen is pointless and semi-selfish. Better that I have a fully developed healthy baby than a few less days of discomfort. Plus, I know my pregnancy is almost over, which makes me think I’ll actually miss (certain parts of) it. As annoying as his incessant hiccups are (which are so strong now that they shake my entire body), it’ll be weird to not have him all safe and snuggled up inside me. The fact that I’ve gotten to feel his movements strengthen and change and develop over the past 9+ months makes me feel like we have a special bond. And now that pregnancy is ending and his birth is imminent, I’m starting to feel like I should really soak up these moments. It’s a pretty cool thing. [That said,
I wouldn’t mind it would be awesome to be able to drink a beer during the Super Bowl]
I started reading up on post-partum stuff, too. I’d been putting it off for fear of overwhelming myself (which I ended up doing anyway), but maybe some stuff will stick once I start that journey. It’s all kind of a jumble right now. Fortunately I’ve bookmarked lots of websites (www.kellymom.com) and books (What to Expect, the chapter on the first week with baby). And I know Kyle will be doing anything and everything to help.
Speaking of my better half. He’s been especially awesome this past week. He lets me whine, he rubs my feet, he goes on walks with me, and he asks me what I need around the clock. He’s going to be the best dad ever. I’m so lucky to have him as a partner through this. He’s been amazing throughout the entire pregnancy, but I can tell he’s as anxious as I am now that it’s getting down to the wire. His last day of work (at his paying job) is on February 1st, which means we will have all hands on deck when the time comes. I’m not going to go into much more detail about him quitting his job, but it’s definitely something we are excited about. His future is in his solar start up company, and in the meantime, he gets to be at home with his wife and son.
My (hand me down) medela pump has all new parts now. It was a pain in the a$$ trying to sort out which parts I needed (why are there 800 pieces to these stupid freakin’ things) and then trying to track them all down (I almost got suckered into some fake knock-offs, but amazon ended up coming through with all medela parts). But in the end I finally got it. They’re still all wrapped up and just sitting on the kitchen counter because I have no clue what to do with them at the moment.
I finally broke the 20 pound barrier. Ironically, my weight gain stalled for a bit during the holidays, but has now returned. I’m officially up 20.5 pounds. And yet, my belly button is still flat. I guess I’m never getting an outie? Some people must just not be able to get one (which is kinda a bummer because I always thought that was like the timer that popped out when things were done cooking).
He definitely still seems to be growing. Every time we meet with our OB he tells us that soon movements will decrease as he runs out of space, but so far that has yet to happen. He’s crazy active at all hours of the day and night. In just the past week I started feeling his kicks against my right rib. It’s only at night, when I’m lying on my side, though. It feels so weird. It’s not really painful; it just feels like whoa that shouldn’t be there. My body reacts kinda spastically when he does it, as if to try to move out of the way to prevent it from happening again, but that’s not really possible. Prior to getting pregnant myself, I remember hearing pregnant women complaining of this very phenomenon. I guess I’m lucky that I somehow avoided it until week 39.
It’s so weird looking back at the first trimester pics. Was my abdomen ever really that flat?? Those were the days…
The painful cramping that began back in week 30 and continued to plague me throughout my third trimester (forcing me to stop working earlier than intended) have now stopped. I mean seriously!?!? What the heck! My body is so confused. I can’t tell if things are moving along or not since I’ve always been carrying pretty low. I feel more pressure (I think?) when I walk, but it could be in my head. I could simply be paying more attention than I was previously.
Sleeping through the night is a problem, yet again, that leaves me feeling drained during the day. I wake up no fewer than 5 times and have a difficult time falling back asleep. If it’s between 11 and 3 am, I can usually get back to my slumber state eventually, but after 4 am it’s a struggle. I often lie awake for hours and hours, trying to zone out and think about nothingness to get back to sleep. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been awake long before Kyle’s alarm goes off. Sleep deprivation feels so pointless without an infant! Once I have a newborn, at least I’ll have a reason to be up at all hours. I swear, if one more person tells me to "get your sleep now, while you can!" or "do x,y,z now, while you can!" I’m going to scream. I’m not a bear. I can’t store up sleep. And even if hibernation were a real possibility, I’m definitely not comfortable enough to take advantage. More importantly, I knew what I was getting into when I decided to become a mom. I’m thrilled that our family is growing, so stop acting like my life is over and I’ll never be able to do anything ever again. This is a very exciting time. Yes, things will be totally different and my world will be turned upside down. But that’s what I want! I’m going to be a mom!!
And that’s about all I’ve got.
The countdown is in the single digit territory. Mind blowing.